SILENCE

img_9860

Tuesday night I found myself at Hillary Clinton’s election party at the convention center in New York City. It was a great evening, with great people, happy people, suddenly turning into anxiety, frustration, a feeling of not knowing what to do. Feeling numb. I went home around 1AM to watch the rest of the drama from my bed. We all know what happened.

The subway the next morning was silent. People just starring into the air. Not even playing with their phones. No one talking. We all know what happened. Yet, nobody is saying a thing. Odd sight for New York where people are not afraid to tell you about their business. I don’t think people actually thought it was possible, that we would be in this situation. What the world needs is to stand together! We see people standing together in the many protest around the country, but I think the most important thing is to talk to each other. Talk, hug, stand together. I’m optimistic, and have always been. We will get through this.

I was originally going to name this post “Tell my jeans to stop touching me” and talk about how I have wanted a pair of checked pants for the longest (and kinda feel like jeans are out), and that I finally found them. But somehow that doesn’t seem appropriate before stating the above. So instead I’ll just show you the beautiful photos, that my boyfriend shot on a sunny Saturday last week. We were strolling on the Upper West side, totally unaware of what would happen a week later… #ImStillWithHer

img_9895

building

untitled-1

footer1

Why do we compare ourselves?

location-soho

The other day I was hanging out with a good friend whom I hadn’t seen in months. We had brunch, walked through West Village to SoHo, did some shopping and had great conversations catching up on the lost time. I felt great. I felt comfortable and self confident.

As we walked out of a store and down Broadway a street style photographer stopped us and asked if she could take a photo. I instantly said yes, thinking it was of us both. And it truly made me feel less about myself when I realized it was of my friend only. All of a sudden I felt invincible (and a bit ashamed of saying “yes” so quickly). Not that I’m not happy for my friend. She deserves the world, but I couldn’t help but feeling a bit disappointed and not good enough. Not interesting enough. Why didn’t that photographer want to take my photo? I had carefully chosen my outfit that morning feeling like the most fashionable woman on earth. Feeling good about myself. So why is it that I suddenly dropped all that and started hating everything about my body. “I’m too short, my thighs are too big, my hair looks too done, my outfit is not that cool.” Why do we do that to ourselves? I hate myself for even feeling like this and not just be truly happy that my friend just got the nicest compliments and her photo taken. I hate myself for thinking that I’m now not only too short and too wrong, but also a bad friend.

The truth is it probably just awoke that insecurity deep down inside me. That insecurity we all have. Maybe mine is just a little closer to the skin. A little more visible in my eyes. A little bigger in my smile. The truth that often lead to me feeling like I have a bag over my head and am invisible to everyone else.

Or am I wrong? Am I just focusing on all the bad things in a situation like that? Why do we compare ourselves to other beautiful women? Why do we think less of ourselves just because someone else is recognized for their existence? Shouldn’t we just be happy for them?

The answer is ‘yes’. Yes, we should be fucking happy for them. I do not know why I – we – compare ourselves. But I know that it only made me feel less valuable.

When I talked to my mom about it, I started crying. And yes, I still call my mom in emergency situations (and every other situation basically – that will probably never stop). Crying because it had made me feel really sad, and crying because I felt safe. She told me that it’s really all in my head. And it’s a dark circle. If I think less of myself, I’m going to feel like other people think less of me. And then I’m not myself anymore. When I’m not myself, why would people see the beauty in me? That question stuck with me. She’s very right. I – we – have to believe, deep down inside, that we’re good enough. Because if we believe that, everyone else will too. And if they don’t, it’s their loss.

new-york

footer1

When did everyday life become fashionable?

img_8312

Since Karl Lagerfeld said so I guess. And Instagram.

Taking photos is a part of my life. And many others. I live in visuals. What will work for photos, which scenery can create a story, and how can I make a metaphor about my new heels and how I feel about life. Also did you really go to the gym, if you didn’t snap a photo of your sweaty forehead or how many kilometers you just ran to all your friends? And did you really have Sunday brunch with good friends, if you didn’t post a photo of the perfect flatly? I think not. Everyday life, and everything that comes with it (doing laundry, grocery shopping, cleaning the house.. Ick) becomes a little more fun if you make a thing out of it. Capture those imperfect moments, you know?

Pasta for dinner? Snap it. Taking out the trash? Pose for the camera. Grocery shopping? Put on a little make-up, your favorite outfit, and embrace that can of soup, bag of rice, or colorful detergent. Look like you mean it. Let the extra long sleeves, someone predicted as a trend this season, protect you from those frozen clams. Hide behind your too-cool-for-school Céline sunnies, nobody needs to know that under them you look like a Saturday night with too little sleep and too many margaritas. Let your perfectly checked pants with ruffled pocket hem emphasize your non existing fear of looking like a grandfather (add a pipe and a trenchcoat and you might as well be 80 y/o), and let those wisely chosen sneaks work as the icing on the cake. You know what you’re doing, while picking up those cans of tuna. Swiping that credit card. Sweeping the dust off of the floor. You got it.

//

img_8222

img_8225

grocery-shopping

img_8337

img_8541

footer1

Sunday activity: flower shopping

 

14442679_10157417768915655_261871606_n

Ever since I figured out that I can get flowers for $5, right around the corner from my apartment (plus the fact that the heat has left The City, which means flowers stay alive a little more than 10 minutes), I’ve made it a cozy Sunday activity to go buy a bouquet of flowers. I love plants and flowers in the decoration, I think it gives the apartment so much life. Last Sunday I went for a baby pink bouquet (I’m obsessed with that color), and couldn’t help but snap a little photo for Instagram on my way home. They look so pretty!

footer1

Visiting the Instagram HQ: Here’s what I learned

14081075_10157259085030655_1045204185_nThe view from the Instagram/Facebook HQ

A few weeks back I had a very exciting meeting. Not only was it with Instagram, but it was with Instagram-legend Eva Chen (I’m a big fan, if your can’t tell). It was all about how to improve the appearance on Instagram, and about the trends and tendencies that are showing. I left so inspired, so I thought “Why not share all the tips and tricks?”. I took tons and tons of notes, so I boiled it down to the 5 most asked Q’s.

How to gain new followers

  • Great original content

    • In the moment, mobile-first, focus on outtakes, and randomness — Photos that look like you took them yourself (with your phone) perform better than polished, professional photography
  • Behind-the-scenes shots — content that is ?more real? and ?intimate?
  • Followers tagging friends is ?a digital shoulder tap? and you should see it as a positive thing
  • Engage with you followers as well as the people you follow
    • Comment on photos, like photos, follow people that inspire you
    • Reply to comments like you are best friends, and reply in a timely fashion

How to gain more likes

  • Show and tell
  • Behind the scenes/ pull back the curtain / everyday life
    • People love to see how other people live their lives and get inspired by it
  • Show personality
  • People open Instagram around 19-50 times a day (I’m guilty of 50+), so Eva actually said that posting 6-10 times a day is the ultimate number if you want to get seen by your followers (I post 3-4 times a day)

Hashtags

  • Outside of fashion, hashtags are HUGE

    • Millions of users are looking up hashtags, so don’t think they are uncool to use
  • Etiquette
    • 1-2 #’s for your caption; put the rest of your desired hashtags in a comment (up to 30)
    • When other people comment with hashtags, they will not show up in searches and use count

Content that gets great engagement

  • Lifestyle, fashion & inspiration (check out Viktoria Dahlberg or Pernille Theisbæk as examples)

    • Curating a lifestyle
    • Think of the grid as show and tell
  • Behind-the-scenes, pulling back the curtain
  • Abundance (Beauty brands ex. organized objects — make up)
  • Place settings

Context

  • Give context about the photo
  • Give followers something a little bit extra they can?t see anywhere else
  • Choose how you want to tell YOUR story and keep it consistent

Video

  • Boomerang — makes you stop and linger

    • Loopable video, no hard-stop, hypnotic
  • Forget about likes for videos — it?s all about the view count
  • Super-produced content does not perform as well on Instagram
  • The first three seconds are the most important
    • Put the most compelling part at the beginning
  • Mobile-first-produced video performs better (content that was made for the platform)
  • Play with slow-mo and hyperlapse

footer1